My mom and I are sitting on the couch, each entirely in our own worlds while visiting the common reality. Law & Order: SVU is playing in the background, an episode I’ve seen at least three times.

I wanted to write something a bit more coherent than last night’s Blue Hawaiian ramble but my mind can’t seem to settle on any one thing. I asked my mom for a prompt to get me started.

“I am totally checked out. Checked. Out.” I like that! Where is your fantasy world? What do you think about when you aren’t thinking about everything else? I day dream all the time. About the career I want to have, the family I want to have, the art I’ll make in the future. I create little worlds full of plausible scenarios while I’m at work – plausible if I speak up a bit, at least.

My mom is taking a mental health day. She’s canceled her appointments and is letting herself be removed from a chunk of reality today. I wish I could do that!  I have to work this evening but I don’t mind because there is the possibility of seeing the dark-haired girl again.

I wish I knew her name.

I’m checked out, letting the time pass when I should be getting in the shower. Thinking about what I could say, the flowers I could bring, the meals I could take my time with. Today is one of those days, one of those I am nowhere and everywhere days.

This was more of a ramble than 3AM crush poetry! Maybe I will make more sense tonight. Tomorrow?

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