(From my journal, orginally written around 2am)

I don’t know how to do this without strength posturing or in plain words outspoken. I’m tired now, script faltering but truth aching to be…freed…released.

I must make room for – sensations & experiences still cloaked to my eyes – growth, nurturing, birth! The labor of carrying and then sharing their light.

This time around is the time I must learn to (lead after) surrender(ing). I think, I feel, I know that I am young here and now but this ancient soul is ready for its purpose.

Where do I start? It’s easier to give a bullet-point list. I am ready, I am ready, I am tired and begging.

I surrender, now knowing that surrender is not a controlled or condescending subservience but a Divinely acknowledged partnership of love and devotion to and through the Divine and my own divinity. I recognize myself and open myself; I recognize your unending wisdom and humbly ask that I may be a part of it.

I admit, and almost as an afterthought, that in this surrendering – though not so severe a feeling upon this release – this soul is ready for its companion…I/She/We are ready and wanting to meet Her. I desire Her, unknown still to me. To love and cherish Her & be allowed to worship Her ( and You through Her)…I wish to be loved and accepted. I’m ready to be loved as myself without expectation. To be healed, held, fed, supported, made accountable, trusted, worshipped.

So Mote It Be



Love, Xannalla